SHAME

Lets talk about shame… for u ppl who doesn’t know what it means in malay, its this little think we call ‘malu’. To me when it comes to talking about shame, it all comes down to how far we are willing to go. If we want to talk about classification, then its gonna take forever. This is because, different people has different perception on what is shameful to them. To others, it may not be shameful to them at all. So, its very subjective. To make it easier and more understandable for u blur people out there here’s a situation…(sorry, its in Malay. To make it more viewer friendly)

STUDENT A: “alamak, cikgu tu tegur aku sebab keluar kelas la!”

STUDENT B: “dia marah kau ker?”

STUDENT A: “takla…dia cakap awak buat apa kat sini? Tak masuk kelas ker?”

STUDENT B: “pastu dia cakap apa?”

STUDENT A: “takde apa-apa… dia terus blah,”

STUDENT B: “la... dia cakap tu jer la?”

STUDENT A: “ye la.....tapi malunya!!”

STUDENT B: “OHH...ingatkan kena marah...”

STUDENT A: “ takde la....tapi malu la tu kena tegur!”

STUDENT B: “OHHHHH………OOOOOKAYYYY………”

AFTER A FEW MINUTES STARING AT STUDENT A, STUDENT B JUST WALKED AWAY, STILL ANALYZING WHY STUDENT B IS SO EMBARRASED

-CERITA INI ADALAH REKAAN SEMATA-MATA TIADA KENA MENGENA ANTARA YANG HIDUP DAN YANG MATI-

So, its better to stop analyzing as to why some people just cant stop themselves from feeling totally embarrassed over the tiniest little thing and just accept it. some people are just born to feel embarrassed about everything and believe me, there is nothing u can do to help them (even if hell broke loose) unless they themselves are willing to change.

If these people happens to be one of ur friend (lucky u!) and they are the type who loves to talk about the embarrassing things that happened to them all day (lucky, lucky u!!) so I guess u just have to do ur job as a good friend and brace urself to hear the never-ending saga (yes, im calling it a saga…believe me! Its never ending!) Say this friend of urs are the people who are open and willing to change and all then maybe u can tell them to just let it go….hey, its nothing! People go through it everyday! But if ur friend happens to be the close type, kita tak boleh la awak! Kita malu! Or another type its not that I care about what they think, I just don’t like it! a.k.a the denial type, -AYAT DIATAS ADALAH REKAAN SEMATA-MATA TIADA KENA MENGENA ANTARA YANG HIDUP DAN YANG MATI-

Sorry, I know it’s a nuisance but people keep asking me who am I talking about. By the way, stop it people! its my blog, my views so just read it and stop getting all perasan that its u unless I said so!

Picking up where we left off, (clearing my throat) when encountering people like this maybe its best for u to just keep ur mouth shut! Yes, its very difficult for some people, especially for people like me, who often doesn’t realize what I’ve said until someone tells me. To me its like a reflex, sometimes I don’t even meant it as a criticism but then, some people have tender hearts. So bent a little la… if u cant seems to shut ur mouth then , its best for u to find some slack and get out of there while u still can! Believe me, if u open ur mouth, especially with the denial type, u’ll end up having the urge to knock ur head hard against the wall and why do u want to spill ur brain out for people who loves living in their oh-so-perfect little world?

For me, I must admit, my shame resistance is pretty high. Some things that seems shameful to others may seem pretty usual to me. Having said all that, there are numerous times where I feel so ashamed and embarrassed to a certain extend where I just want to sit at the corner of my room and just cave in. I swear to god, if I can drill the wall and hide myself in it I would! However, in the end I always come around. Well, what doesn’t kill u will only make u stronger right? But I do not think that phrase apply to everyone. I mean, seriously. I see the same people get worked up and embarrassed over the things that had happened to them over and over again. Being the listener, sometimes I would go like eh? Macam déjà vu jer?? And the next thing that pop in my mind after that is shut up and say nothing!

U may think im being very selfish. Why cant I just tell them? Remind them? What is the harm in that? To certain people, yes. I would certainly remind them. The thing is, I don’t have a very high tolerance for people who likes to come out with numerous reasons (and unthinkable ideas) as to why they feel the way they do. Firstly, they don’t have to justify themselves to me. Unless its someone important to me then I would definitely ask for justification. Secondly, im just too lazy to listen to reasons. Okay, I admit I do that too. Im referring to certain people out there who likes to come out with sooooo many reasons and not to mention contradicting statements to defend that one particular action of theirs that in the end it just seems too ridiculous to me! The best part is that, I have to listen to them despite the fact that my ear is bleeding due to the internal haemorrhage in my brain (sebab tak dapat terima any of the reasons) and all this is because I just cant seem to keep my mouth shut!

So if there is one thing that Ive learned during these past few months is that, sometimes its better to just keep quiet. As long as it doesn’t affect me in any way then its fine…

However, there is one thing that keeps bugging me these days. Involving cleanliness and again, shame…

But maybe I should just keep quiet for the time being. Testing my tolerance level. Haha…..yeah, right!